A Week of Panic!

      In the last month we’ve sold concessions at an auction, had 2 day yard sale, and filled our yard with 627 pounds of aluminum cans. It would be reasonable now if we decided that we needed to relax a bit and take some time off. I guess we’re not all that reasonable, because all of that stuff seems like a vacation this week as we prepare for the biggest step so far in our adoption journey: our home study. So instead of taking this week and relaxing, we’re running around the house in a panic, cleaning (and re-cleaning) everything we can find in preparation for our case worker’s visit to our house.

     That panic is based not in reality, but in the fact that we have no idea what to expect. Sure, we’ve read every book we can find, talked to everyone we can think of, and done more research online than we thought was humanly possible, but that doesn’t change the fact that we’re still new at this. All that research is great, but none of those books gave us a guarantee about what would happen at our house. I mean, what if she wants to look in our fridge? She could, right?  I guess it’s possible, so we cleaned that out. Does it look bad if we have a bunch of dirty laundry? Just in case, we’ll wash every bit of clothing we have. At this point, I’m prepared to be judged based on what brand of peanut butter we use. (It’s JIF, but I’m picking up some Peter Pan tomorrow just in case).

      At the end of the day though, all of the fear and worry over this home visit can be calmed by thinking of one simple question, “Why are we adopting?” When we ask ourselves that question, we know that we’re doing this because it’s what God has called us to do. When we first decided to do this, it was after weeks of prayer and discussion, all of which was leading us to the same direction. If we are going to trust in God to guide us in our decision, how can we not also trust Him to guide us through the times when we’re stressed or uncertain? Despite the brief moments of stress at our house this week, we take comfort in the fact that God is bigger than anything we’re worrying about.

     As of tonight, we have about 2 more days to get the house ready for our home study. And I’m sure over those next 2 days we’ll be running around like crazy to make everything spotless, but we’re also going to remember that ultimately God is in control of our adoption from even before we knew about it. I didn’t mean to be preachy this week, but if you’ll allow one more thing, I’d like to ask (if praying is your thing) for your prayers this week as we prepare and go through our home study. We’d greatly appreciate it. We will continue to pray that this process goes smoothly and that we will be able to let go and let God take control of what He would have us do. By this time next week, I’m confident that He will have guided us through a successful home study and have us one step closer to bringing our child home. Even if we don’t have the right kind of peanut butter.