I can't fully explain the mood I was in Saturday except to say this, it wasn't good. I'm not sure what it was. It could have been that a stressful week at work was finally catching up to me, or maybe I just work up on the wrong side of the bed, but either way, by Saturday I was not feeling my best. Those of you who know me well will know that I generally have 2 settings; the times I think I'm the smartest person in the world, and the other times when I'm absolutely sure of it. By Saturday evening, I was absolutely sure I knew what I needed to get out of my bad mood. It was church. I knew that I could get to church on Sunday morning, God and I could have a little meeting, get me ready to start a new week, and do it all in less than an hour, (talk about efficient!) then have me home in time to watch the Colts. No problem.
Sunday morning I woke up early (like I always do), sat around the house for a few hours (like I always do), then got ready at the last minute (like I always do). We made it out the door with 2 minutes to spare which, at our house, is pretty impressive. As I shut the door behind me, I looked at the woman I live with who I'm related to by marriage and said, "So, you got the keys?" I was expecting an adoring look followed by, "Why of course, my darling, and here they are. Now let us drive away to our house of worship!" Instead I got a look that I could loosely translate as, "No, you dope! Why would I have the keys? Geez, I married an idiot!" Mercifully, she just said, "No." So there we were, on the porch with no keys to get into the house, no keys to drive the car and all doors and windows locked. Not how I pictured my day starting.
So for the next 30 minutes or so, through intermittent rain, I attempted to break in to my own house. With all my tools being locked inside the house, I was forced to improvise. I went to work with the head of an interchangeable screwdriver I found (no idea where the rest of it was), an extension cord that I used as a rope, and (the most technologically advanced tool of all) a stick. I should say though that I have a whole new appreciation for the security of our house, because not only was breaking in terribly difficult and time-consuming, our dogs freaked out at the thought of someone trying to get in.
After a half hour, much to my (and the dogs) relief, we were able to get inside. Instead of being stressed again though, the entire ordeal left me laughing all day. As much as I wanted to make it to church, I think that being locked out of the house is what I really needed to snap out of whatever bad mood was getting to me.
There are times that I try to compartmentalize God. To put a little spot on my schedule from 11-12 on Sunday mornings and make that His time. Yesterday was my reminder that all time is His time. Maybe you're not as bad as I am about this, but God needs to remind me sometimes that He is with me when I'm locked out of my house just as much as when I'm sitting in the pew at Syria Christian Church.
If you read this blog with any regularity, you know that we're working on a lot of things with this adoption. And for every one of you who has picked us up with your help, kind words, and prayers (all of which are amazing, by the way), there have also been times where we are discouraged and feel like any progress we've made is nothing but a drop in the bucket. In times like these, it's been helpful for us to remember that God is in control, that He has our child and our child will come home to us in God's time, not ours. As always, we know our child exists and is with God awaiting his homecoming. Although on days like yesterday, it's hard not to imagine our child saying, "Lord, why is my dad trying to break into the house with a stick?"
Have a great week.
Sunday morning I woke up early (like I always do), sat around the house for a few hours (like I always do), then got ready at the last minute (like I always do). We made it out the door with 2 minutes to spare which, at our house, is pretty impressive. As I shut the door behind me, I looked at the woman I live with who I'm related to by marriage and said, "So, you got the keys?" I was expecting an adoring look followed by, "Why of course, my darling, and here they are. Now let us drive away to our house of worship!" Instead I got a look that I could loosely translate as, "No, you dope! Why would I have the keys? Geez, I married an idiot!" Mercifully, she just said, "No." So there we were, on the porch with no keys to get into the house, no keys to drive the car and all doors and windows locked. Not how I pictured my day starting.
So for the next 30 minutes or so, through intermittent rain, I attempted to break in to my own house. With all my tools being locked inside the house, I was forced to improvise. I went to work with the head of an interchangeable screwdriver I found (no idea where the rest of it was), an extension cord that I used as a rope, and (the most technologically advanced tool of all) a stick. I should say though that I have a whole new appreciation for the security of our house, because not only was breaking in terribly difficult and time-consuming, our dogs freaked out at the thought of someone trying to get in.
After a half hour, much to my (and the dogs) relief, we were able to get inside. Instead of being stressed again though, the entire ordeal left me laughing all day. As much as I wanted to make it to church, I think that being locked out of the house is what I really needed to snap out of whatever bad mood was getting to me.
There are times that I try to compartmentalize God. To put a little spot on my schedule from 11-12 on Sunday mornings and make that His time. Yesterday was my reminder that all time is His time. Maybe you're not as bad as I am about this, but God needs to remind me sometimes that He is with me when I'm locked out of my house just as much as when I'm sitting in the pew at Syria Christian Church.
If you read this blog with any regularity, you know that we're working on a lot of things with this adoption. And for every one of you who has picked us up with your help, kind words, and prayers (all of which are amazing, by the way), there have also been times where we are discouraged and feel like any progress we've made is nothing but a drop in the bucket. In times like these, it's been helpful for us to remember that God is in control, that He has our child and our child will come home to us in God's time, not ours. As always, we know our child exists and is with God awaiting his homecoming. Although on days like yesterday, it's hard not to imagine our child saying, "Lord, why is my dad trying to break into the house with a stick?"
Have a great week.
-Adam
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