Why fundraise?

       We've had a lot going on this month, which has been great, but also pretty exhausting. Regardless, we're excited about what's been going on. A lot of great things have happened in the last couple of weeks for us. In the last two weekends we've sold concessions at an auction and had a fundraiser yard sale in Orleans. Both took a lot of work, especially the yard sale, but after we finished up we were able to make a big step forward in our adoption fund. Thanks to all of you who stopped by the yard sale this weekend and to those of you who donated things for us to sell. You helped make it a great weekend.

       Talking about our adoption fund this weekend got me thinking though, why are we fundraising in the first place? I don't know that we've ever explained this fully, but I feel like we owe that to you. To clarify, if you said, "to help pay for the adoption costs," then yes, you're technically right. What I'm getting at though is why are we having public fundraisers instead of paying for it ourselves and taking out loans. Although we'd be lying if we said that there weren't at least some financial reasons for it, our reasoning goes a lot deeper than that.

       First of all, we have to acknowledge the financial side of it. We aren't poor by any means. We aren't what I would call rich either, but we're doing ok. That being said, we don't have the ability to go write a $20,000 check with any confidence that it wouldn't bounce. Since that isn't an option, we looked at taking out a loan to help cover the expenses. There are some really great places that do adoption loans, some of them are even interest-free. So loans would be a real option for us if there wasn't someone standing in the way. His name is Dave Ramsey. We're disciples of Dave Ramsey and, as he says on his radio show every day, "Debt is dumb," so we couldn't really see ourselves taking on that much debt. This left us with our current situation, saving and fundraising.

       But our motivation for fundraising isn't purely financial. From the very beginning of this process, we wanted to be very open about everything we were doing. If our goal was simply to get our child, then there are quieter ways to go about raising funds. But we wanted to be very public with our fundraisers because that's how we can raise awareness. We know that we aren't going to be able to talk to thousands of people about adoption through what we're doing, but that doesn't change the fact that we're never going to stop. This has become a life-long issue for us. From now until we can't do it anymore, we will speak about adoption to anyone who will listen, because this issue really is that important. And hang on to your wallet, because we'll keep trying to raise funds too. Whether it's for our adoptions (yes, that was plural) or to help other people adopt, we are committed to doing what we can, when we can, for as long as we can to help kids find homes. Through the small fundraisers we've had so far, we've been able to talk to several people about adoption. Most of them won't adopt, and that's fine, but maybe they'll donate to an adoption charity or mention adoption to someone they know, but the important thing is that we can all do something.

       I hope that you understand why we're so vocal and so passionate about this. It's for our child, of course, but it's just as much for the next child that needs a home. This process has given us a platform, however small it may be, to speak about this and hope that people hear. In my lifetime, I will never see an end to the crisis of orphans in the world, but if enough people are informed and determined, we can see positive change happen. I want to teach my kids how important adoption is so that future generations might be able to bring these children home. Is it a long shot? Absolutely, but real change starts with us. My dream is that someday when we're old and we have whole family over (after 2 generations of adopting, picture the United Nations cafeteria at lunch time), we can talk to our kids and grandkids about what kind of problem this used to be. And we can tell them about how wonderful it is that God chose us to be a family.

       Lastly, we ask a lot of you. We've asked you to buy shirts and bracelets. We've asked you to come to dinners and yard sales. We've even asked you to dump aluminum cans in our yard (that's May 10, by the way). But please, don't ever think that we aren't monumentally appreciative for what you've done for us. We heard a story the other day about a guy who was acting like a real jerk, which isn't a big deal, I suppose, but what irritated me most was that he represents a charity. So on one hand you can ask people for money, but then you can treat them like garbage? That's not right. And it bothers me because I hope that we never make you feel like we don't appreciate all that you've done. Without all of you, this uphill climb that we're on would be a whole lot steeper. You have made this process a joy and for that we can't thank you enough.

Longest Blog Post EEEVVVVEERRR

Before I start, I would like to remind folks that we are having a yard sale! This Friday and Saturday from 8:00 to when ever people stop showing up. We are having it at 6208 N Co Rd 75 E in Orleans. If you take Roosevelt St. out of town, the house is on the left, across from Paoli, Inc. We have SO much stuff, including a Ping Pong table, furniture, tons of clothes, and household items.
 
The next thing I would like to add is, if you don't have anything to do on Saturday (other than our yard sale) go to the Campbellsburg community building! A group of women have started a business called "The Market Place" and they have so many amazing decorative things! They are going to be open from 10:00-5:00. This year they will be donating a portion of their proceeds to our adoption fund! It is so great of them and we are very thankful for their generosity! If you would like to check out some of their items, check out their Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/CampbellsburgMarketPlace
Ok, Now on to the blog:

 
In our family, Adam is the creative writer. This is why all but one (now two) blogs have been written by him. With good reason, I ramble on about who knows what!
Before I start my glorious ramblings that I have been holding back for about a month, I would first like to say I am deeply sorry if I offend anyone in the making of this blog. That is not my intent.

At this current moment in time Adam and I are waiting. And waiting. Not yet waiting to be selected by a birth mother, but waiting to schedule our home study to then wait 6-8 weeks to get it done so then we can be on the list to wait some more. This is not the fault of our adoption agency (they are amazing) but the state who is taking their sweet, sweet time to schedule their annual audit. One great thing about the waiting is we are going to be the most patient parents in the world.

While waiting, I have had a lot of time looking up adoption information. As Adam has pointed out before, My name is Ashley Brown and I am addicted to Pinterest. I have become obsessed with watching profile videos and videos of folks stories about meeting their children (most from overseas). Of course all most everyone of them, especially when the little kiddos meet their new families, make me cry. These videos bring me to ramble # 1. Infertility. We have dealt with infertility, sort of. We went to the doctor, they basically said "Good Luck" and we went on our way. In many of these videos there are parents who spend thousands upon thousands of dollars to then either have no luck or have 8 kids and get their own TV show. I have to say I disagree with this.  Sometimes people complain and complain about not being able to have "Their Own" kids, then when they finally decide to adopt, it's an attitude like, "well, this is our only hope."  I know they don't see it this way, but it seems like they're settling. It makes me think the child will always be 2nd place and never "their own". I have a hard time describing it exactly, so this one might be the silliest rant of all. However, if God brings infertility into your life, embrace it. On our questionnaire, it asked how infertility has affected your marriage. It tears a lot of families apart which is sad. Infertility in our family has made Adam and I closer, so much so. If you want a child, instead of spending the money on a medical procedures and drugs, consider putting it towards your adoption. The way God works through the adoption and through you and your relationship with your family and God is AMAZING.

Ramble #2. I could make this one much shorter. American adoption vs. International adoption? I say who gives a poopy.  I had watched a facebook rant the past week, which everyone as knows, facebook rants are AMAZING. This one was from WDRB about a family who adopted two children from Ethiopia (I think that's the right place) with HIV. On this post there were over 100 comments most negative about how these people should have never adopted these kids. I actually have a lot of mini rants from this. 1) For the people who were complaining about how "we'll be paying for these kids with our tax dollars." These children are not going to suckle on the government teat because of their health issues. When adopting children the insurance has to pick them up like there are no pre-existing issues. In order to adopt them in the first place, the parents would have to have proven that they not only had adequate insurance for the children, but the means to take care of all of their needs. There are times we should worry about how our tax dollars are being spent, but this is not one of them. 2) Question: "Isn't overseas adoption easier than adopting in the U.S.?" (another statement that was brought up multiple times) Answer: No. Now, I know I shouldn't speak of international adoption because that's not what we are doing. However, I do know that you still have to have interviews, home studies, a trip, if not multiple trips, overseas, sometimes to places that aren't necessarily the safest places to go. Plus you can't always get health backgrounds or all the medical conditions. So my opinion is they are both hard, exciting, nerve-wracking things, but well worth it. Don't go somewhere just because you think its the easy way. Pick a country that you feel comfortable with. 3) Next comment, "U.S. adoption are horrible. The kids seem to almost always go back to the birth parents." False. Every state is different, but in the great state of Indiana, parents have to sign over their rights soon after the birth. If a birth mother signs over her rights, few, if any, judges will reverse that. It is very rare in Indiana. While I can't speak to many people's experiences with foster care, I know that when an adoption is finalized, that's it. The child isn't taken away without cause after 5 years or more like some people had commented. And the last thing on this facebook story was 4) "It should be USA for USA! Don't adopt overseas, take care of our own!" To this I just shake my head. Adoption is adoption. Who cares where they come from, as long as a child has a good home.

This pretty much brings me to my last annoyimg rambling: Abortion. I know, touchy subject for everyone. I would like to go on the record saying I am COMPLETELY against abortion. I think, as soon as the child is conceived its a baby. Now, however, I look at abortion completely differently than I used to. I see it now as, if these children are born, what is going to happen to them? Pre-adoption, I wasn't as concerned about what happened to the child as long as it wasn't aborted as long as it got to live. Even if the mother didn't want the child, at least it got a chance to live. There are 3,288 (in 2011) abortions every day in the United States. (1.3 million abortions every year.) Let's say they make abortions illegal. That would be a wonderful thing. But now,  "adoption Ashley" says "Where the Heck are these kids going to go!?" We would have 1.3 million kids to find homes for. It blows my mind. That's over a million kids who need a forever family. If we are going to be pro-life, we also have to be pro-child.

There are around 147 million orphans in the world. If abortions stop, hopefully soon, that can potentially add another MILLION children to that number. What are we going to do with all these kids?! If the 147 million kids where sick it would be an epidemic and politicians, doctors, world leaders and everyone else would be doing everything in their power to solve it. However, they just don't have families and I guess that's no big deal? It breaks my heart. So this is my call. My call to ask you to help. Not necessarily for us, but someone, someone adopting, a child somewhere, or an agency. I have said this before but 35% of Christians think about adopting. 35% actually sounds like a good number, but only 2% actually adopt. It's really upsetting. We are called to care for the orphans. Now, I am not saying by any means "Yeah everyone go get you a kid!" But I think if God puts something in your head, there is a reason for that. Support Orphanages, Donate, Reach out, SOMETHING! None of us can do everything, but all of us can do something.

 And if adopting a child is what you are suppose to do, DO IT! Don't be scared. There are, of course, people who will put it down. People who you would think be so supportive end up tearing you apart and some may even talk about how horrible it is. But the great thing about it is the other people will be there. People will come out of the woodwork to help! People you think would never help, give more than you can ever imagine. People you don't even know. I'm not just talking about money, but support for the bad days and just someone to give you encouragement. And if money is the issue don't let it be. There are so many fundraisers out there! And if not fundraisers, there are grants! I mean, Adam and I are collecting cans! Cans! People's trash is helping us raise money for our child (May 10th by the way).

 I cannot say enough how great it is how God does things through adoption. You will hear other folks amazing stories and things seem to fall together so perfectly. Gods timing - PERFECT.  When we first started, a lot of people told us "Well I hope you will be able to have 'Your Own' one day". When you adopt, the child is your own. The child we get will be my child. I have never missed or loved someone that I have never met so much. I hurt for this child. For the waiting. Someone we know told us once that they love their biological child, but with their adopted child, the love is just different and powerful. I didn't understand what they meant at first. But now I do. And it's a great feeling.

So like I said before, I am sorry for my ramblings. I hope I didn't offend anyone. That's not what this was about. I just really hope some of you, if you are on the fence about adoption, consider it. There are SO many kids that need a home. And if you don't feel like you are being called to adopt. Help. Help the kids, help the adopting parents, help the agencies. Help someone!

Busy Bees

We're right in the middle of a very busy month, so we wanted to update everybody on what we have coming up. Next weekend we'll be selling concessions at an auction just down the road from our house on Orchard Rd. in Salem. You can find the auction listing in the newspaper or on salemleader.com to see if there's anything you're interested in buying. Even if there's not, you can come say hi and buy a hot dog or a piece of pie from us.

The next Friday and Saturday (26th and 27th) will be our yard sale in Orleans. It's going to be huge! We'll be at 6208 N. Co. Rd. 75 E (right behind Paoli Inc.) and we'll have just about everything. We spent most of our day Saturday pricing items and boxing everything to take it to Orleans. There are so many boxes that they've overtaking most of our house. So come out both days and buy some stuff. Please! Help me get my house back!

The first weekend in May will be a break for us (finally!) before we get to the event that I'm most excited about: Can Our Yard Night! I honestly cannot wait for this. I've been excited about this since we first heard of the idea, but I don't think I've been excited as some of you have. It's been months since I've gone more than a few days without having someone say how much they're looking forward to trashing our yard. It's got me a little concerned how much some of you are getting in to this. It makes me wonder what kind of terrible things I've been doing to you people that you'd get this excited over dumping trash in my yard!

Regardless, between 6-11 that night, you can dump all the aluminum cans you like into our yard and we'll be glad to take them. We're going to be roping off the area where you can dump them (to keep any from getting to the neighbor's yard), and we'll also have an area where you can pull into the yard and unload. People tend to drive a little too fast on our road, so we'd rather have you drive through the yard and keep everyone safe. I'm sure we'll have more details to fill you in on as the time gets closer.

Other than that, we're still playing the waiting game. Our case worker is expecting to do our home study sometime in May (let's all pray it's not during Can Our Yard Night. She'll think we're slobs!), we're just waiting on some scheduling things at her office to be resolved. The home study is our next step, and waiting for it to be scheduled has been stressful, so I can't imagine what the wait for our child will be like. We're so fortunate that we have those of you who have helped us so much. Whether it's been through your donations, fundraiser help, or prayer, it's uplifted us through this process. Even the times when we've been stressed have been a blessing because we have so many wonderful friends who've chosen to take this journey with us. We're more grateful to you than you could ever know.

See you next week!

Me, My Wife, and Her Boyfriend

       For the past few months, everything has been about our adoption. Whether it’s been our fundraising activities, this blog, etc., it’s all been about the addition to our family. This weekend, however, we had a new addition to our family: Ashley’s boyfriend.

      Ok, maybe I should explain this a little. First of all, I decided to surprise Ashley by taking her to the Reds-Nationals game in Cincinnati on Saturday. She likes the left fielder for the Nationals, Bryce Harper, and had mentioned before that she’d like to see a Nationals game sometime, so I surprised her with tickets to Saturday’s game. After some trouble getting there thanks to some roadwork, (come on Kentucky Dept. of Transportation! Work faster!) we finally arrived at the ballpark. Although we missed his first at bat thanks to a talkative usher, we were in our seats to see his second time at the plate. A 2-run homer later, our family added a new member. Ashley walked in as a casual fan, but by the time that ball finally landed, he was a part of our family. For the rest of the game, I heard how great Bryce Harper was. Whether it was, “My boyfriend will probably hit another homerun this time,” or “they won’t try to run on my boyfriend” when a Reds base runner stopped at third, my afternoon had become a Bryce Harper love-fest. It was pathetic.

     Despite hearing how great he was and, by association, the Nationals were, we had a lot of fun. She had fun telling me how he’s awesome and I had fun laughing at him when he struck out late in the game, all of which made me look forward to having our child. I can’t wait to take our kid to games and try to get him to take my side in these “arguments”. I’ll be trying to convince our child to be a Reds fan and (as long as Bryce Harper is playing) Ashley will be trying to convince him to be a Nationals fan. But that’s the fun stuff. Those times that you get to spend together as a family at the ballpark, or talking trash to mom on the way home; those are the kinds of things I’m looking forward to. It’s those little times that make a family a family.

    So as much as I probably should be distressed by my wife’s new, multi-millionaire boyfriend, I’m not too concerned because it makes me look forward to the fun times we’re going to have with our kid. I’m prepared for her to buy him a tiny Nationals jersey, and I’m ok with that. And I’m going to remind him that we cheer for the Reds and the Red Sox and no one else, but we’ll leave it up to our child and see what he decides. Unless of course he wants to be a Yankee fan. Then he might be moving in with grandma.

Wowzers April!

April is a great month. It's the month of opening day baseball, April Fool's, and showers that bring May flowers. It's really quite awesome. This year though, April is about more than that. We're going to be going non-stop this month in an effort to get some fundraisers finished. So no opening day baseball for us, no April Fool's pranks, and please, please, no showers (at least while we're doing things outside) because this is a work month.

We're not totally busy with adoption stuff. The first weekend in April will be busy, but nice. We're doing some family stuff which will keep us busy, but will be fun. By the time the next weekend rolls around though, it will be time to put on your game faces because we're getting down to business. We're having a yard sale pricing day at our house. We've been planning to have a yard sale as a fundraiser for a long time. Ever since we had that idea, we told people we knew who were having yard sales, "Hey, if you don't want that leftover stuff, we'll take it." While that seemed like a good idea, the yard sale items quickly overtook one bedroom in our house......then another......then a room at my sister's house.......and my mom's house. So on yardsale pricing day, it all comes out to get priced for our first yard sale at the end of the month (more on that later). We're excited to get this going so we can make some money for our adoption fund, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't excited to get the rest of our house back.

The next weekend, April 20, we're selling concessions at an auction near our house. We did this before and, hopefully, we learned from the mistakes we made last time. For example, we learned last time that people like to drink coffee first thing in the morning. (Who knew?!) Also, we learned that, if you're going to have food in cans, it's a good idea to bring a can opener. Despite a few mistakes, the last auction went great and we hope this one will too. Besides, I don't think we'll make the same mistakes twice. We'll make exciting new mistakes! So mark your calendars for the April 20 auction on Orhcard Rd. in Salem. We'll remind you again closer to the day, but it should be a lot of fun.

Finally, at the end of the month we'll be having our long-awaited yard sale in Orleans. Almost anything you need, we'll be selling. I'd list what we have, but it's probably easier to list what we don't have....puppies. I'm pretty sure anyway that we aren't selling puppies of any kind. Although if our dogs misbehave on pricing day, I can't guarantee you they won't get a pricetag stuck on them. The yard sale will be Friday and Saturday the 26th and 27th in Orleans (we'll have the address for you later) and will be a part of Orleans town wide yard sale day, so if we don't have what you need, someone probably will. But come check with us first, please. We'd appreciate it.

So, other than that, it should be a relaxing month. I'm not complaining though, it's all going to be worth it in the end. As exhausting as it will get, we're excited about all of the action going on this month. The more work we do toward our adoption, the more excited we get. It's going to be a fun few weeks. If you can join us for any of the events or want to help us with pricing, auction food, or working the yardsale, let us know. Regardless though, make plans to come see us on some of those days. We're going to have a lot of fun and look forward to sharing that time with all of you.

 

::Reminder Note::

Don't forget we are also having "Can My Yard Night" on May 10th! So keep saving those cans so you can litter our yard with them!